A Writing Exercise

Interactive television may someday bring viewers the opportunity to fashion different endings to the plays that they watch. However, this is likely to consist essentially of choosing amongst different canned scenarios.

A far better exercise, always available, would be to actually write different endings to various programs; thereby exercising and improving one's creativity and writing skills. It is necessary that the new endings fit in seamlessly with the overall plot and with the speech and thought patterns of the characters. And, most desirably, the new ending should be an improvement over the original script. This exercise will develop skills and confidence in aspiring writers.

(The Reality: From time to time I think of different endings to plays on TV, instead of doing something useful. This kind of activity can be of some value, if done occasionally, but it is far inferior to that of original character creation, plot development, and the fashioning of realistic and compelling narrative throughout the entire script).

Below is a different ending that I created to a popular TV program.

BATMAN AND ROBIN

In one of the TV episodes Batman and Robin were tied on the ground, with a massive block of cement about to be lowered on them. I have no further recollection of the story, and none of the dialogue. Was it the Penguin? Assuredly he was capable of such a dastardly deed. So I will use his persona with the expectation that he will not charge me with defamation of character.

Penguin: Well, it's time to say goodbye. When I press this button, the cement block will start moving down. That will cement our relationship! So long!

The Penguin and his henchmen leave, laughing loudly.

(I have no knowledge as to how Batman and Robin escaped, but I am inclined to believe that it was by some method that does not bear scrutiny for logic or imagination).

Batman: Robin, we've been through many difficult situations together, but I never had to say what I must tell you now.

Robin: Give it to me straight, Batman. I can take it!

Batman: I know you can, Robin. So here it is. The Penguin clearly demonstrates a lack of proper breeding.

Robin: What?! Coming from you, Batman, that's strong language!

Batman: Yes, Robin. I dislike saying that about anyone. But the Penguin's laughter at our perilous situation clearly shows a lack of character, which is the result of improper breeding.

(The slab of concrete is moving down).

Robin: What causes that, Batman?

Batman: There are two competing schools of thought: Heredity or Environment. Then, there are some insecure people who say that both of these factors are involved.

Robin: Gosh, Batman, you're an anthropologist!

(The slab is moving more rapidly).

Batman: Well actually, Robin, there is a profound and bitter dispute as to whether this matter should be analyzed by anthropologists, sociologists or biologists. The argument is headed for the World Court.

Robin: So that should take care of it.

Batman: Not entirely. There is a matter of national pride as to which country should have the primary responsibility for the analysis. It has resulted in a battle between the Germans and the French. The Germans insist that this problem belongs to their category "Was Haben Wir Jetzt?", while the French are equally insistent that it is a native "Je Ne Sais Quoi".

Robin: Gosh, Batman, you're a linguist!

Batman: Thank you, Robin. I believe strongly that everyone should learn a foreign language, and that the best time to start is early in childhood. We really can't understand another culture and appreciate its literature without at least a good reading knowledge of that language. Now take Dante, for example...

Announcer Breaking In: Batman! You have only a few seconds to get yourselves out of there! Stop worrying about the Penguin's Breeding, because soon you won't be Breathing!

How do they escape? At this point my imagination fails me. (Please, no unkind remarks).

All that I can think of is something rather obvious. Batman has a false tooth that contains pellets driven by compressed air. With his tongue he presses the tooth and causes a pellet to fly out and hit the "up" button on the control panel, causing the concrete slab to reverse direction.

At that point he should be able to figure out how to get untied.